First, I can’t take a picture of myself with my phone backwards. That’s for damn sure. Second, I took like fifty shots and each photo made me look worse than the previous photo – you can barely see my hair in this one but at least I look human – as opposed to a freaky dried up mummy hag. This is not good for my fragile ego. And I have a chicken neck. And quite possibly a giant nose, either that or I’m wearing Groucho Marx glasses and left off the glasses part.
Sorry. I tried taking a picture in bright sunlight so you could see the haircut, but I turned to sparkly vampire dust, in the car while waiting in line at the car wash, but I ended up with zebra stripes across my face, in the kitchen but all you could make out was my nose. I’d let my husband take a photo but he’s way worse than me, even when I’m holding the phone backwards and can’t see what the hell I’m shooting. When he takes a picture of me, I look exactly like an extra from The Walking Dead.
I have big teeth. One eye is larger than the other. My chin is really long. I look as if I haven’t slept in ten years. Ack!
Okay, my husband says he’s taking a better picture soon. Maybe. I’ll believe it when I literally see it.
This is me, Penny Watson. Visit at your own risk!