People always say, “Well at least you have your health.” Well, yeah, duh. It’s been a given. I’ve never not had my health, until now.
I’ve scoffed at death, laughed in the face of disease. As a critical care nurse I’ve helped the sickest of the sick.
The Common Cold? Kablam!
Strep Throat? Kablooey!
Oh sure, I suffered through the usual childhood chickenpox, measles, mumps… And there was this one ear thing that stopped my budding Olympic swimming career cold- but never you mind that.
Let’s talk about these stupid yellow jacket venom injections.
Since I began getting these injections so I won’t die from a single yellow jacket sting, I’ve been catching every bug known to man.
If I’m at the grocery store and a woman twelve aisles away from me sneezes, I catch whatever she’s spewing.
Oh, walking into the clinic to get my venom injection? Through the hoards of parking lot zombies? Walking all the way down to the far end of the long long long corridor? Past all the kiddies? Past the old folks? Everyone coughing? Hello? Please people, could you put on your bubble helmets before you leave the house?
Taking care of my husband? I won’t do it anymore. If he gets sick again I’ll be forced to move into the dog run.
This is the second time in five months I’ve caught a virus from him that’s become pneumonia and this time is way worse than the first time.
This is so not funny. I want my super power back! I had one super power and it’s been stripped from me. Life isn’t fair!
Wasp venom is my Kryptonite.