My husband and I were hiking this morning, discussing how much time we both devote to our dog– by necessity. You know, the woman who bought Jake’s full brother gave him up after nine months. She couldn’t take it anymore.
At least two or three times a week someone stops me expressing gushing admiration for our beautiful German Shepherd dog and asking where they can get one just like him. We have decided these people should take a quick quiz to see if they are really ready for a dog like Jake.
Get out that pen and paper and take this test. Scoring: 1-strongly disagree, 2-disagree, 3-maybe, 4- agree, 5-strongly agree.
1. Are there at least two people at home prepared to dedicate their lives to keeping a dog happy? (1-5)
2. Do you enjoy working 10 hour days, arriving home and immediately going out for a 90 minute hike…year-round…in the dark/rain/mud/sleet/snow/wind even when you’re sick and after you’ve already hiked for an hour first thing in the morning? (1-5).
3. Do you sometimes complain that triathalons are not challenging enough? (1-5)
4. Do you not care if your beautiful backyard lawn is turned into a patchwork quilt of brown pee spots? (1-5)
5. Do you not take it personally when some people, upon spotting your dog, immediately freeze in abject panic? (1-5)
6. Do you enjoy chasing your off leash dog as he pursues wildlife into the next county? (1-5)
7. Is your idea of a good time thinking up clever games for your dog to play and then playing those games 3 hours per day, every day? (1-5)
8. Are you OK with blocking off half your house so when the front doorbell rings you have to walk twice as far to answer it? (1-5)
9. Are your neighbors OK with routine raccoon clearance operations carried out at 4AM involving lots of running around and barking? (1-5)
10. Are you OK with waiting to pack for a trip until the very last minute because even looking at a suitcase sends your dog into a catatonic depression? (1-5)
Add up your score:
(30-50) Go for it!
(20-30) Proceed with caution.
(0-20) No fucking way
All credit for the test to my better half, Oscar. I merely edited and formatted.