A-cuttin’ and A-pastin’…slidin’ down that slippery slope…
Real Women Can Move Their Mouths!
Recently, I received an invitation to a Plastic Surgery Party. Really? Do I need work? Is that what you’re hinting at? The truth is, I didn’t take it personally. An acquaintance is hosting a Plastic Surgery Party and she’s afraid nobody will attend so she is begging and begging and begging me to come. I have no interest. I ain’t sayin’ never, no way, no how, but right now? Hell no. I like the fact that I can actually smile and my eyes crinkle in the corners when I do.
As my husband says, women addicted to plastic surgery begin to look more like each other than they look like themselves. ICAM. Two people I know well are addicts - it’s a slippery slope, baby. A slippery slope. Like drug abuse. My acquaintance tried to entice me into coming to this party with giveaways. Giveaways? Yeah…drawings for free botox injections and restylane. Done on the spot! Laser treatments the same night! We’re talking Gateway Procedures - seemingly innocuous, but think about it…slippery slope. The plastic surgeon coming to the party injected my acquaintance with both botox and restylane so she could show her guests the results. I wasn’t impressed. Her cheeks are now so high she can’t see over them. This is how it begins. First you’re having that wrinkle smoothed from your brow and the next thing you know, you’re sipping your meal through a straw, your chest looks like an inflatable raft (Can I ride those suckers down the Salmon River?), and you’ve turned into the spitting image of Jim Carey in the movie, The Mask, when he’s wearing the mask! I’m not joking.
It’s interesting how in the past week I: 1. Received the above invitation. 2. Watched some weird-ass show on the Food Network about catering exactly this type of plastic surgery party - OMFG - I would hate to be that caterer and I do cater on occasion. 3. Happened to read the below article from MSNBC. 4. Watched the segment on casting directors and the perils of plastic surgery on CBS’s The Early Show.
So…in summary - I believe in plastic surgery. I do understand the merits, especially when it comes to disfiguring accidents, scars, birth defects, burns - got it. Totally behind it. Plus, I have no beef with women and men who tweak a bit here and there. When my daughter was in the third grade, her best friend’s mother looked old enough to be her grandmother. She’d sustained a tremendous amount of sun damage to her fair skin, surfing and playing tennis. She had a face lift. Beforehand, she made a public announcement and said she was sick of everyone thinking she was her daughter’s grandmother. This woman came out on the other side looking fabulous and the surgeon was careful to make her look normal. You could not tell she’d had a face lift. After the surgery, she looked much more her true age. In her shoes, I would have done the same thing without hesitation.
But…this obsession to become Barbie? It’s just plain wrong. Sorry ladies - you overdose on plastic surgery, you end up looking like a freak. Is that politically inc0rrect of me to say so? Below are some interesting links. I apologize if the post is offensive, but I’m a bit overdosed this week.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20068105/ns/msnbc_tv-msnbc_tv_commentary/
http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=6443699n&tag=related;photovideo
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/01/14/heidi-montags-10-plastic_n_423855.html
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btM7MkW_kVY&feature=player_embedded
