What is Edinburgh but the site of historical plots and counter plots? An ancient city built atop the tail of a volcano with the Palace of Holyroodhouse (still in use by the British royal family) at the lower end and Edinburgh Castle at the upper end of The Royal Mile. And the perfect place to launch our Take-Down Graham Campaign. By the way, those statues in the gateway of Edinburgh Castle are William Wallace and Robert the Bruce.
So while we lounged in our unbelievably inexpensive off-season three story Georgian Mansion, we plotted our revenge. I’ll get to that. First enjoy these photos of Arthur’s Seat, the ruins of Holyrood Abbey, St. Margaret’s Chapel in the court of Edinburgh Castle - it’s the oldest surviving building in Edinburgh, Edinburgh Castle, The Palace of Holyroodhouse, the Royal Mile and the Lewis Chessman from the National Museum of Scotland. Oh yes, the Palace is haunted, for sure and for certain. Don’t tell my husband I told you, but he was quite overwhelmed when we stood in the room where King James was born (James I of England and VI of Scotland) - because he’d heard me talk about it forever. And I’ve got to tell you, the dining room where the Queen’s (Mary Queen of Scots) musician, David Rizzio, was stabbed to death, was so cramped I don’t know how all those big Highlanders managed to fit. Mary, herself, was almost six feet tall.
So, what did Mrs. MacKenzie and I do? Of course we went to the source. We contacted the company that had hired the guide. Now that they had our money, those phone calls we’d made prior to our trip had been conveniently forgotten. Their response was - “If you had ‘special needs’ and could not handle the hiking, you shouldn’t have chosen this trip.”
Uh…what? Did you leave your brain in a drawer? Remember the description in your brochure? Hiking along well-defined trails, twelve to sixteen miles per day, with occasional easy to moderate climbs. Utterly inaccurate.
I was so pissed off. I reminded these people of their reassurance that we would have no problem. The truth is, I could do the climbing. I could do all the hikes. My issue is descending. It’s tough when you have titanium screws and bolts and pieces of hard plastic in your knee. I rehabbed my ass off in order to regain full range of motion in my left knee. My activities had already been curtailed by my accident and the doctor who rebuilt my knee told me I must avoid two things - running, except to get out of the way of a bus, and hopping from rock to rock, as in technical rock climbing. Many of our climbs down these hills and mountains were as close to technical climbing as you can get without ropes and harnesses. Fortunately, rocks don’t scare me. I’m good at picking my way up and down. On our own, my husband and I would have been okay. We might have been irritated as hell, but we would have been okay. For Mrs. MacKenzie’s sake, if we’d known the sort of climbs Graham had in mind, we’d have looked for other options. Not to mention his overt cruelty towards her and his insulting, patronizing attitude towards all of us Americans.
Worst of all, Graham dismissed our claims. He had the balls to say the following - “None of these Americans came prepared to hike. They were in pitiful shape and couldn’t keep up, especially Dr. Barrett and Mrs. MacKenzie. We had to wait for them every day. They held the group back.”
Oh. My. God. That’s when my husband, who had remained calm, cool and collected all along, blew his stack. He’d done Graham’s job the entire trip, making certain the stragglers were safe both on the way up and on the way down. As I said before, my husband could and can hike and climb rings around evil Graham. And Graham knew it. He also knew damn well that I’d been right there in the front of the pack each and every hike.
You should have heard my husband on the phone. He insisted they call up our English companions and ask for their version of events. Graham tried to convince the travel company that the English would support his story so they needn’t call. Ha! Ha! Ha! Our English friends backed us up 100%. We received formal letters of apology and a partial refund. And Graham got his ass handed to him on a silver platter.
Fist pump!
Don’t think for one minute that what I took away from this trip is Graham. What I remember, what I will cherish forever, is the unearthly beauty of the Highlands and Islands, and the warmth and kindness, good humor and good sense of the Scottish people. Julie, from the Outlandish Dreaming book blog, followed in our footsteps this year. She and her family stayed with Graeme and Fiona; I think they may have been the last guests before the bed and breakfast closed. They also rented the same mansion in Edinburgh. I was so excited for her! And so very jealous!
Thanks for hanging in with me. Tomorrow, back to the business of books.
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- The Machair of Toe Head and Ceapabhal Hill My husband says my posts are negative and depressing. Criminy!...
- This is not the end. Loch Ness and Culloden. Graeme Ambrose, as opposed to Graham, is a certified (Scottish)...
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It’s been an adventure. I’m glad you were able to put Graham in his place.
What an asshole! You husband did the right thing, and Graham insulted him for it.
This trip looks so amazing….the history, the scenery, all of it. Do you think you’ll go back?
“Dr. Barrett held the group back…?” What a mistake! Graham showed no compassion or common sense for people he was responsible for.
You would think it was in the best interest of the travel company to not blame or provoke their best possible means of recommendation-paying customers.
I think I know which travel company this linked to ( possibly initials MS?)
My husband takes me on some grueling trips where we suffer alone and fend for ourselves because he has such a strong aversion to ALL planned and guided trips. He dreads what you went through.
XXOO Kat
Glad you stood up for yourselves against the evil Graham (not to be confused with the nice Graeme) and you still have wonderful memories! One of these days, I’ll continue posting about my trip - and I can’t thank you enough for all your advice and recommendations! I can attest that Graeme and Fiona on Loch Ness were wonderful and the Georgian townhouse was amazing although not as warm and cozy as the places we stayed in while in the Highlands and Islay - city living is very different and I realize I preferred the country. I want to go again and see Lewis and Harris and the Shetlands! I want to see the Borders too - for such a small country, Scotland is huge with so much to see! It is beautiful and the people were so nice - and the accents are to die for (although I never did see anyone remotely like Jamie Fraser!)
Thanks for the fun travelogue!
Oh, Julia, that was lovely how you stood up for yourselves. Even lovelier that you didn’t allow Graham to ruin your vacation.
I’m dying to see how THE NOVELIST gets her revenge on Graham. I vote for leaving him trapped in a peat bog.
I think I’m voting for that too, Jaye - when I write my historical romance! Or possibly my time-travel romance and I’ll leave him stuck in the past.
Hi Julie. I loved Loch Ness too. I’d move to the area in a heartbeat! Yeah, didn’t see any Jamie Frasers running around. I figure all those brawny Highland warriors bit it at Culloden.
Yeah, Kat, Dr. Barrett held the group back! Can you believe it? I don’t mind suffering if I’ve chosen to suffer, but when I’ve paid for a guide to help me not suffer quite as much? What a jerk!
Yes, Penny. We’ll definitely return to Scotland. We have friends who live near Aberdeen. I’d go every year if I could afford it.
Thanks, Amber!
Graham so deserves the punishment that’s coming his way! lol Peat burial might be too good for him.
I can’t wait to read your Scottish historical.
XXOO Kat
Well, he was ENGLISH what the hell do you expect ya pair of numpties. That’ll teach ya. Next time you book a trip insist on a Scottish guide. If I can keep losing weight and get back into shape you never know I might be available. Mind you at the moment if I were to take you out and we got stuck in the wilds you could snuggle in to ma big highland body for warmth, both of ya.
And when you do write him in, don’t kill him, start torturing him on page one and still be doing it on page 1000.
Right my sweet I am off to my pit. The lovely Ishbel has abandoned me for the country pub tonight and I have warned her about not coming back without the sticky toffee recipe, send her a reminder on twitter @ishbelstronach
Lurv Ya
Yes Tom. I have been properly chastised. We were expecting a Scottish guide - Graham was a last minute replacement. The instant I met him I knew what we were in for. Oh, good idea, let the torture begin!
You can take us fishing on Loch Ness, but I’m afraid I’ll catch the monster!
Okay, tweeting Ishbel!
Well, every trip has to have the one or two things that don’t work to make the good experiences all the more memorable. The Maitre d’ hotel in the Venetian cafe, who I had asked for a taste of a dish and who was angry, actually yelling at me that I did not want it. It was pasta for heaven’s sake, not gold plated caviar. The flight attendant who lost it, to the tune of being relieved of duty, because none of the people traveling in the Haj had ordered special meals but they expected them. It is truly a shame when people are endangered by malevolence or incompetence.
And if the company doesn’t satisfy, the internet will. People read those trip advisor comments.
Yep, it’s always something in travel or everyday life. Rolling with the punches makes it easier I think.
That and, remembering that some people are asshats, they either became asshats or born that way. Maybe in time they will find an asshat gene and be able to help them. They can start with Graham.
Steph
Steph, how true. I’m going to write a time travel romance and strand Graham in the past, possibly in the peat bog at Culloden. Perhaps when the English are coming.