Somewhere in that commercial montage is ‘the band aid’. “No, dude, you gotta do it quick, like a band aid.” Watch for it. It’s my fave for so many reasons.
I had planned to write about the vast world of hurt, publishing and my personal experience with rejection, but I’m having second thoughts. I had to rip that sucker off my psyche quick, like a band aid, so I wouldn’t feel like such a fucking loser. You know what? It still stings a little. Hmmmm…should I talk about it or shouldn’t I?
Do I really want to dredge up all that negativity? Shudder…
And by the way, can someone please tell me why everyone is talking about an em dash and why I care? (Sorry, watching a Naked Eric Northman makes my mind run in strange directions.)
Okay, concentrate on blog, not Naked Eric, oh but Naked Eric is soooo….
I think I’ll post a conversation. This is a portion of a conversation with a publisher that I left out of Incorporeal. Like hubby says, you gotta be careful what you say to me because I have an eidetic memory.
She - “I bet you haven’t even sent in query letters or submitted to publishers and agents.”
Me, clenching my fists and clearing my throat - “I’ve sent in so many query letters, and subbed so many manuscripts over the years that I bet if I stacked one on top of the other, the pile would be a good six feet high, maybe higher.”
She, laughing at me not with me - “Well, what’s wrong with you? Didn’t you follow the guidelines? Didn’t you send the queries to the right agents and publishers?”
Me - “Of course I did. I read the guidelines for each and every literary agent and publisher before I subbed anything.”
She - “Then you must have subbed to publishers who don’t accept unagented submissions.”
Me - “Of course not. I searched out publishers and agents looking for work in my genre and I followed all their submissions guidelines.”
She - “Well did you read the rejection letters? They must have told you why they rejected you.”
Me - “Most of them didn’t reply at all, despite the enclosed stamped, self-addressed envelope. Most didn’t reply to electronic query letters either. For years I read each and every rejection letter, but the only thing every letter said was: Dear Author, your work does not fit our needs at this time. The Agency/The Publisher
She - “I find that hard to believe.”
Me - “Why?”
She - “Because I’m certain agents and publishers must have sent you suggestions for improving your work.”
Me - shrugging - “Never.”
She - “I don’t believe you.”
Me - “It’s true. Not a single agent or publisher replied with a personal note. I stopped reading the rejection letters a couple years ago, just tossed ‘em into the recycling bin.”
She, incredulous, - “Why would you do that? How stupid! I can only imagine the good advice you’ve thrown away!”
Me - “There was no advice.”
She - “How do you know that? You threw them all away.”
Me - “Easy. Remember Johnny Carson, Carnak the Magnificent, how he could hold an envelope to his head and tell what was in it? I could look at an envelope, hold it in my hand, feel the heft and the weight, and I knew without a doubt that it contained nothing more than a quarter of a sheet of paper. There wouldn’t even be a return address on the envelope. Dead giveaway. It takes too much time to write, print or stamp a return address on a rejection letter sent to a nobody. I knew if I opened the envelope I’d find an anonymous, generic, typed letter of rejection…a single sentence…no letterhead, that would be wasteful, so unless the postmark meant something to me, I wouldn’t even know who’d sent it.”
She - “I’m sure you’re wrong or you’re exaggerating.”
Me - “No. I’m not exaggerating and I’m not wrong. I stopped subbing to agents and mainstream publishing houses two years ago.”
She shook her head. Convinced I was lying
.
No, dude, you gotta do it quick, like a band aid!
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1st of all, this woman is an idiot. Ignore her.
On any given day, you could get an agent. Depends on what she ate for breakfast. If she had a fight with her husband that morning. If she’s in the mood for light and funny, dark and serious. It’s a crap shoot. Always. Does not matter. You are on a path, and it may or may not include an agent. Bottom line is you write good stories and readers like them. And perhaps more importantly, YOU like them. You need to change your way of looking at these “rejections”…..not a good word choice. For whatever reason, you and that agent are not a good match. She doesn’t get your voice, your humor, your storytelling, whatever. You are looking for the right match. And in the process you find the “not-quite-right match” as well. That’s okay!
Honestly, I would feel sorry for any writer who has this woman as an agent. When you met her, you knew she was the wrong match for you. Even if she offered you representation, would you have accepted? Think about that. You’re allowed to dole out “rejection” too.
Oops! I just realized she was a publisher. Either way…..I don’t think you would want to have anything to do with a publisher like this. Very bad feng shui! Hee hee……
Did you read the speech Sherilyn Kenyon gave at the RWA this year? O my goddesses. Life has truly let loose a canoe-load of crap on that gal, and her work.
I loved the bee-otchy publisher in Incorporeal. Not just a bee-otch, that character was a sorry excuse for a human being.
I agree with Penelope. Sometimes these things seem as if luck has more to do with it than anything else. How else could so much crap get published and then masterpieces get turned down.
I think I read somewhere where a guy did and experiment and sent a manuscript of an actual book considered a classic to an agent and the agent rejected it for some reason or the other. No rhyme or reason. That publisher had no excuse for her behavior toward you.
I loved the Giants commercial montage! It’s so funny in a sweet natured way. It doesn’t play in my area, and I wish it did.
The publisher you mentioned is in her own insulated world of make believe if she honestly thinks rejections come with lots of helpful advice… Mine never did.
XXOO Kat
PS What’s the em dash controversy? I love the brave little em dash . I hope they don’t want to do away with it. Maybe we should list it as an endangered punctuation? I virtually gave up semi-colons in fiction, now this too?
Yeah, what is this em-dash controversy all about? LOL! Naked Eric is way hotter!
It doesn’t bother me, Kat. I’m more trying to make a point. I have never had a single rejection come complete with words of wisdom and encouragement. Each contained a single sentence, no signature, not even my name.
Delilah, interesting experiment! I’d love to read about that. It’s true…so many wonderful work is turned away while major crap gets published and promoted.
Okay Steph, spill! What happened to Sherilyn Kenyon? I haven’t heard. The publisher? Her own words…
Penny - I agree. Realized that right away.
You know, Penny, even if I wanted an agent at this point in my career, I doubt I could get one. I think every single agent who represents romance writers has turned me down flat. How’s that?
Their loss. I mean that from the bottom of my heart. Since I think your writing is flawless, the only thing I can think of is that your books are not “cheeseburgers”….they are unique and different, and do not necessarily follow the paint-by-numbers routine. Perhaps that is why. It is also why I love your writing. On the positive side, there is one less person to take a cut of your profits! I’m so positive…hee hee! :^)
https://www.facebook.com/notes/sherrilyn-kenyon/keynote-speech/10150227610525810
Publishers.Agents. work on what is good market and what is good writing.
Steph, pretty powerful. I had no idea she’d faced so many challenges.
Every author’s story is quite different. And the publishing world is changing so fast I’m not sure hard work and good stories are enough any more.
Penelope - Hah!
Hmm, can’t picture that publisher responding to every single author whom she’s rejected with a note of advice. Your Carson response was perfect-and too smart for her, lol.
And don’t forget…you ARE published my dear!
Two things, one relevant, and one sort of relevant.
Sort of relevant: behavioral economist Dan Ariely has done numerous studies on pain and discovered that pulling a band-aid off slowly actually results in less discomfort than pulling a band-aid off quickly. It has to do with how your body registers pain - apparently duration is not registered as strongly as intensity. He has written two books: Predictably Irrational and The Upside of Irrationality. Both are quite good and I have reviewed them both on my blog.
Relevant: Wow, that’s a person in publishing to avoid. I harbor delusions that I might actually have something worth publishing one of these days, but one thing I know enough about to know that I am not going to enjoy is the submission process. Loads of rejection letters are sure to pile up.
Aaron (Dreaming About Other Worlds).
Aaron - you make me laugh! Yeah, the publishing world is a very odd place. Good luck - you have lots more options these days!
Next time, I’ll try pulling a band aid off slowly and see what I think. I’ve got to look up those books!
Thanks, Evie! Yeah, it would take a very long time to send a detailed critique to each and every person you reject!
Julia-
Thank you for making my 3 hour plane ride so fast! I started and finished INCORPOREAL and felt like you made the time zip by. Great story, lovely sexy, poignant paranormal. I wish I could have given you 6 stars all over the Internet.
Hugs,
Sharon
Dear sweet Sharon, thank you. I’m so glad Incorporeal made your plane ride ‘fly’ by! Where were you?
Flight from BWI to RSW. We’re in Punta Gorda FL. Vaaaaacaaaaay!