So here’s how it is - I live like a damn vampire.
Oh, I get my second venom shot on Thursday, wish me luck! I had a sort of reaction to the first injection so the doctor postponed the second for two days.
I wake at 5 a.m. to walk the dog in the dark. We walk for an hour in the neighborhood because I can’t risk disturbing a yellow jacket nest in one of the wilderness parks. Besides, I don’t really want to encounter either coyotes or mountain lions or even a rattlesnake, despite my doggie protector.
I get home around 6 a.m. which gives me an hour to work in my garden, get plants watered, fill up the fountain for the birds… finish up any outside chores, and that includes something as simple as walking to the mailbox.
I remain indoors until at least 40 minutes after sunset, just to be certain the yellow jackets have retired for the night.
The sun set at 6:20-something last night. Jake and I left the house at 7:15 p.m. and there I was, walking in the dark through a neighborhood park, and a stinking yellow jacket ran smack into my eyelid and fell onto my chest. Thank god the thing was disoriented in the dark and forgot to sting me. Tonight I’m not leaving the house until 8 p.m.
I pray for the following - Rain. Mist. Cold. Winter. The end of daylight savings time.
The dog stares at me, wondering what the hell is wrong. He wants to do stuff! I can’t do stuff!
I was looking online last night and do you know I can buy a bee suit for under $70? I’m thinking of buying one. I’ll look like an idiot hiking, but at least I won’t be risking my life.
I swear, this is the weirdest, silliest, most ridiculous thing that’s ever happened to me. But man, experiencing anaphylaxis once is more than enough. I don’t want to go there again.
So how’s this for a fashion statement? Shall I buy it?
Hell, if I was you, who cares how you look as long as you’re safe and can go outside?
Knew I could count on you, Anny!
Cue John Wayne (make that Joan Wayne)… “A gal’s gotta do what a gal’s gotta do. Pilgrim.”
You could start a trend, Julia.
A small, exclusive group, probably, but you’d want to keep it elite anyway, right?
Do what you have to do to stay safe.
You know, Marylin, manufacturers should market suits to those of us with deadly allergies to bees and yellow jackets. I can just imagine the advertising campaign!
I can hear John now, Tim!
This is perfect! You get the best of both worlds - safe from the bees and you’re outside.
1. I think you’ll look hot in that outfit.
2. Move to Boston! It’s cold here! Bees die! DIE! DIE! DEATH AND DESTRUCTION TO YELLOWJACKETS!
I say go for it. I didn’t think I cared if I got outside much until we had a smoke filled valley for three weeks. By the end of the first week, I was bat shit crazy to go outside. With my asthema, that was impossible. My dear husband brought me a mask from work that filtered out the smoke. I looked silly, but it was worth it. Walking has never been so fun.
Monetize it!
It’s a nice white billboard! Put on it the names of all your books (as many as will fit), with a copy of the cover. You can get iron-on transfers of digital images. If you have an inkjet printer, you can make your own (hobby and craft stores carry the blanks).
$70 - plus a few for the transfers - and you’ll probably make the local news. Cheapest advertising campaign in history.
Only problem is people may stop you to 1) make it easier to read you, and 2) talk to you. It may make it harder to get your exercise, but think of the publicity!
OMG, ABE! Hilarious! I could use the cover for Beauty and the Feast - now that would get me some attention!
You’re so brave, Stephanie! I really must do this!
Hi Pen. Fortunately it’s cold here today. Got my second shot and it went way better than the first shot! Yay! Hey, read ABE’s suggestion - I can put a cover on the white bee suit! Cool, huh!
I think I’m gonna do it, Amber. I’m just waiting for the promised rain. If it rains this weekend I can save myself some money.
When you get the bee gear make sure to be fashionable..Hey if you gotta go out at least look good..
I plan to try to make it as fashionable as possible, Savannah!
Hang tough, girl. Its supposed to be cooling down. I love the fact that you’re up and out the door at 5. Look at all you’re getting done.
On the suit..depends on the comfort level.