Here’s the deal. Out here in Cali, the grasses turn a lovely gold color in the late spring, and they remain gold until the rains start in the late fall. Usually by January, the hills look like the Emerald Isles. Really really green.
So the problem with the golden grasses is foxtails…sticky grass seeds that cling to your dog’s hair and undercoat. If not removed they burrow their way beneath your dog’s skin, between his toes, end up in his nose, ears, eyes, trachea, and you’re screwed. We’re talking major abscesses and Super-Size-Me vet bills. I’ve actually suggested that the vets around here offer a Foxtail Insurance Policy. So far, no takers.
Every day Jake and I hike for 1-2 hours. When we return home, I spend an hour and a half exploring every single inch of his body, removing foxtails. It’s been that way since he went for his first hike last summer. Is this a pleasant experience for either of us? Hell no. He doesn’t exactly hold still and I end up pulling out chunks of hair. I have two different brushes, but the truth is, my fingers work better - I can get all the way to the skin. He handles this about as well as can be expected. By the time I finish, he’s so exhausted he sleeps for a couple hours. No matter how diligent I am, I always end up missing a few. That means several days later I’m digging foxtails out of his skin with a pair of tweezers or my fingernails. Not. Fun.
He has this great orange harness that he wears when we hike for two reasons: so that people will realize he’s a young dog, assume he’s relatively friendly, and not freak out when a big German shepherd bounds up to them. And because the chest piece keeps the foxtails off his chest. The material is perfect for repelling foxtails. Love. It.
So I googled the company (in New York) that makes this particular harness, and I called them. I wanted to learn if they had any plans to produce full body suits for dogs in California, or if they’d consider producing full body suits for dogs in California. Man, I’d pay a bundle to save myself hours of time and avoid vet bills. A. Bundle.
The Conversation: (I would have emailed but only retail clients are allowed to email.)
“This is blah-blah-blah. Blah-blah-blah speaking.”
“Hi. This is Julia Barrett. I’m one of your customers out in California. I use your harness for my dog.”
Silence.
“May I speak with one of your Customer Service representatives?”
“Why?”
“Well, I’d like to commend you for the design of the harness and find out if your company produces, or might consider producing a larger sort of harness to…”
“Why?”
Okay…”Well, because I live in California and we have a problem with foxtails sticking into our dog…”
“Why are you calling?”
Pause. “Excuse me, I did reach Customer Service, right?”
“Yes, this is Customer Service.”
“Well I’m wondering if I could speak with someone about the possibility of a larger harness or suit made with the same material you use for the regular harness to…”
“We don’t take any suggestions from consumers.” Click.
WTF?!?
I would seriously pay someone a few hundred dollars for a doggie foxtail suit.
Mr. Blah-Blah-Blah needs to go back to Customer Service School. Man, did he miss the boat. I won’t mention the company because I wouldn’t want to be sued for slander, but if you’re out there and you know how to make a proto-type suit for different sized dogs using the sort of material that’s used for basketball uniforms…leave me a comment!
And now to the edits! I’m excited to get on with it…and feeling much calmer tonight.
