That’s right. How blessed am I… This is exactly what you want to hear the night before surgery.
“I know a freelance exorcist and I’ll give him a call because, like, you know, between your broken finger and your torn up knee, I figure, well, just maybe you might could be possessed by some demonic spirit and not even know it. He works freelance for the Catholic Church, you know. Like exorcising and stuff. He talks to the pope.”
Yeah, in his mind he talks to the pope. Because il Papa Francesco is always out there recruiting random crazy people to perform exorcisms.
And I’m like, “Uh, maybe your exorcist can make my knee spin around until the knee cap is in the right position and then my cat can vomit up a hairball. Besides, we’re friggin’ Jewish!”
And she’s like, “Well maybe you should take some tumeric.”
Oh Christ. (Cue eye roll.)
At least my dad appreciated the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue I sent him for his birthday. He said, “You should have warned me. I could have had a stroke upon opening the package. I looked at the photos upside down for ten minutes before I realized I’d started at the wrong end. It has two covers! Am I allowed to show your mother?”
Thank god for my dad. At least my other sister made me laugh. She was so pissed at her accountant she said to send the exorcist her way. And she wished me well.
So… talk later loves. Julia
P.S. Oscar says - “Exorcism has never been known to cure klutziness.”
So, the sister offering the services of the ‘freelance exorcist’ who work for the catholic head honcho, is the dippy one I presume and the other one who wants his services to make her accountants head spin, is the evil one ……
So that must make you, and I’m just following Oscar here…, the klutzy one
Just don’t, after they fix you tomorrow, fall out of bed or at least if you do, fall on the good knee
You’ll be fine and out hiking chasing drug dealers and mountain lions in no time at all xxxxxx
Blessings and prayers-no exorcism required!
Ah, Julia, I’ve missed your wit. Having been away for a month again in places where computer access is a challenge, I’m glad I’m back to enjoy your posts. This is funny. You have a lovely family. Hope your surgery goes well. Prayers and hugs.
Exorcism??? Might as well believe in voo-doo. Or Black Magic. At least with black magic you get Frank Sinatra.
Never thought my family could be beat for crazies. I am starting to doubt that.
He talks to the pope
The only appropriate response:
Uh, does he know that TV is one way, that the people in his TV can’t see or hear him?
Good one, William. I’ll remember that next time she suggests I may be possessed. Or maybe she thinks Poltergeist (the movie) is real?
There’s a bunch of us crazies, Roberta! Never fear- you are not alone.
Thanks, Diana. Still numb so so far so good! Hope our travels were interesting.
Thanks, Anny sweetie!
LMAO, Tom! You’ve nailed us! I did make it up the stairs and into bed. I’m reasonably good with crutches.
Aren’t we all a little crazy?
Hope you’re recovering nicely, Julia.
Oh my, Julia. I’m afraid this post has totally ruined the lovely image I had created of your recovery. The one where you lounge prettily in your canopied bed, while wearing a silk bed jacket, your feather boa near at hand in case your neck needs warming, while a handsome houseboy fetches your tea and scones, and your cat is curled up on a pillow, comforting you with his purr.
Pea soup spew has invaded my imagery. Tell your sister, thanks a lot.
Sorry, Jaye. Yeah, totally ruined my pre-op healing meditation. Kept thinking about demons. Nice. The good news is I’m fine, or I will be in a month or so. The pain is already, and surprisingly, so much less.
We are indeed, Amber!